Ghosts

The rumble from the storm, fear in my eyes, white as snow. The soft sigh you breathe, barely audible yet resonating through me. The fight about to begin, this time you’ll listen. I’m tearing you apart just to feel release, you’re sitting in silence. You don’t hear me. I’m screaming and fighting and crying and you just sit. The heat in my gut rising up to my throat, and now my eyes. My body shaking between sobs and you just sit. My heart screaming, wanting it to stop. Finally you break. You don’t want me anymore, I’ve done it now. I’ve made it to where you cannot stand to look at me. To think about me. To love me any longer. 

I’ve thought about that moment a great deal in my life. Of how much I regret losing you and how much it hurts that even now, you look at me with a sadness in your brown eyes. I did love you once, and you me. You knew how to make me laugh and smile and you knew the right words to say when I was losing it. Then it all stopped. You were gone. You didn’t want me. I broke our ties so severely that even those eyes held nothing but pity for me. That’s all that was left. Pure unsolicited pain and pity. Yet even now I can’t help but to love you as I’ve always have. And always will. 

Contemplation

Our fates intertwine like the roots of trees

Crossing each other's paths for only a moment 

Our heartbeats grow rapid as time passes on

Have we lived our lives to the fullest?

The stars above are merely an illusion

An imprint in time that has long passed

Is that what humanity will become?

Merely an imprint of something once thriving

Simply a memory of future's past

Will we be our own undoing? 

Fire

I feel so raw, so incomplete

Taken over by you, I wish for peace

Earth shattering, mind blowing, heart pumping release

Fill my mind and my body with perfect serenity

Deliciously lingering, loving, and thrusting

Kissing and nibbling, biting and fucking

Intensity rising, breath quickening, eyes closing

Sensation so full, so hot, so exhausting

Perfect pleasure consuming my body

I gasp, I plea, I moan so audibly

Meld into me, and never let go

Oh please come baby, please let it show

Earth quaking, world shifting, beautiful storming

Love me always, tonight and in the morning

The promise of tomorrow holds me tight

The possibility of forever keeps me high

This all just feels so right. 

I see the fire in your eyes

Limbo

Everything around me is gone.

The trees.

Gone.

The birds. 

Gone.

The children...   gone. 

The lives of thousands of people around me whisked away by the wind. 

It doesn't feel like wind though.

It's not a refreshing breeze, the kind that gives you hope on a bright summer's day.

It's a cold gust carrying the dead. 

All is silent.

Everything around me is a haze of grey. 

The air, the ground, the sky.

Grey.

What happened?

Then it hits me. 

My breathing turns shallow as you flood into my mind. 

Where are you?

I can't see you.

Feel you.

Hear you.

I call your name.

Nothing.

My heart begins to race.

I start to run.

Looking all around to see some hint of you.  

The ashes hit my eyes and they begin to tear. 

Again, I call your name. 

Nothing. 

I fall to my knees with my face in my hands.

I don't feel the ground.

I don't feel the air. 

I'm numb. 

Everything is dead.

Gone. 

You were right here. 

Smiling. 

Laughing.

Loving.

Why did you go?

Why did you leave me?

I can't exist without you. 

Please come back to me.

"Shh."

I look up.

A small girl is standing in front of me.

She wears a white gown that is almost blinding against the world of grey. 

"W-where is everyone?" I choke out.

She says nothing and stares at me.

"What's your name?" I ask, "Where is your mommy?"

Her blank eyes widen slightly, yet she continues to say nothing. 

"Can you talk?" I inquire. 

She then holds out her hand.

I reach up to take it. 

As I touch her hand memories flood into my mind. 

You and I were at the park.

There were children playing, and couples strolling.

The sun was warm against my skin and the music from the birds was enchanting. 

You and I were lying in the grass under an oak tree.

My head lay upon your chest and I listened to your heart beat.

Your hand rested on mine and you brushed my fingers with your own. 

The smell of summer air and earth tickled my nose. 

You were humming a song to me as I lay there.

The kind of song that only the heart can provide. 

The purest of songs. 

Then everything went dark.

There was no sound.

No air. 

No smell.

Just black.

I look to the girl as she looks at me with a knowledge far beyond her years. 

"Where am I?" I ask. "What happened?"

"This is Limbo." She says.

It's not all black and white. How can you appreciate the world around you if all you can see is race? The world is made up with plenty of other colors, sounds, tastes, and textures. So see the whole spectrum, listen to the songs of others, get that bad taste out of your mouth, and feel something other than your own spite for once.

Shout out to the one person in Poland and one person in Brazil who's read This.

Wonderland pt 1

The door opens and I go in.
My whole world is turned upside down.
The furniture is above me and I’m standing on the ceiling.
My time is running out.
I begin to run; run toward anything familiar.
An opening in the wall I enter.
I find myself in a forest where curious plants reside.
I’m frightened.
Running, running, running.
I don’t know my way.
A smiling cat stops me in my path.
He flashes his fangs at me and hisses,
"Why do you run?"
I cannot reply.
This terrifying creature before me has taken my breath away.
His smile covers from ear to ear.
“WHY do you run little girl?”
I try to spit out an answer, but no words are freed from my lips.
He vanishes, but his laughter is echoing all around me.
I begin to run.
Strange trees fly past me.
A sign that reads “Don’t step on the Mome Raths.”
Running, running, running.
I come upon a house.
A booming voice enters my ears.
"WELCOME TO MY TEA PARTY."
A madman stands before me.
His hair like fire and his hat taller than I am.
"YOU’RE LATE."
Astonished, I cannot move.
I can’t breathe.
Everything goes black.
Darkness encompasses me.
I being to walk.
I think I’m walking.
Toward a light.
I come upon a clearing.
It’s another forest.
No.
It’s a meadow.
Everything is just so much larger than I.
Curious.
I begin to walk through this meadow.
A sickly sweet smell fills my nose.
Singing?
Do I hear singing?
I come across a caterpillar.
He’s exotic and beautiful.
He sings a rhyme about a crocodile.
I stand and listen until he suddenly stops.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE CHILD?"
I try to tell him that I’m lost.
The words won’t come out.
His voice becomes fierce and angry.
"WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOING. HERE. CHILD?"
I begin to cry.
It hurts.
I croak out, “I don’t know!”
I begin to run again.
He calls after me..
I think he says, “You’re calling the smiling cat!”
Everything’s mad here.
No time to stop.
My time is running out.
Why AM I here?
Running blindly through dense vegetation.
SNAP.
Oh no.
I’m falling.
SMACK.
I hit hard ground.
I’m in a hole.
Dammit.
He said, “You’re falling into her trap!”
But maybe I can call the smiling cat.
I whisper, “Please, wherever you are, help me out of here.”
He materializes.
Fangs sharp and smiling ear to ear.
He begins to cackle.
Hisses, “You can only help yourself out of here little girl.”
Vanishes.
His laughter.
Angry and evil.